Why is it that some long-term couples continue to have engaging and exciting sex, while for others it becomes boring, repetitive, or unemotional? Many people believe that good sex simply relies on a combination of tactile stimulation and erotic fantasies, but it is actually much more complex than this.
We are taught that sex should be a natural and physiological experience, that we should innately know how to do it, even if we have never done it before. Although sex is somewhat instinctive, we cannot rely on our instincts alone if we want to have really great sex.
The first thing we need to do is work on ourselves, on our feelings, and our emotions. We must learn to understand what turns us on, how we feel when we are aroused, and the physical and psychological effects arousal has on us, so that we can manage this within a relationship. Our world, however, is moving at an ever-increasing pace, so much so that we often struggle to find time for ourselves, and end up doing everything in a hurry, including foreplay and sex. This creates a great deal of stress, so we prefer to focus on our other priorities and commitments, to the detriment of our relationship with our partner, which ends up taking a back seat to our everyday responsibilities.
So, how can we maintain love and passion in our relationship, and continue to have great sex even after many years together? According to the author, all we need to do is follow a few simple rules, which have nothing to do with unusual sexual positions, extravagant erotic fantasies, or novel sex toys, but instead focus on creating a deep bond with ourselves and our partner. This bond helps give shape and space to the love between the people in a relationship, which is crucial if we want to experience sex at its best.