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Never Split the Difference

Christopher Voss, Tahl Raz

Never Split the Difference

20min

20min

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Never Split the Difference means: never accept compromises, because they are likely to be the worst solution for both parties. In his 24 years at the FBI, Chris Voss has learned the art of negotiating in the most difficult field, the one that sees human lives at stake. His experience has allowed him to develop techniques applicable to one’s private and professional life. Active listening, knowledge of others, empathy, use of the tone, analytical skills, are all examples of the tools you can use to master becoming an expert negotiator. Voss also teaches how to distinguish which negotiation style is best suited for different situations.

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Analysis and key concepts

01.

Really listen in order to identify the true needs of the interlocutor

02.

The three voice tones you can use to make our interlocutor feel at ease

03.

Use empathy to welcome emotions and successfully negotiate

04.

Using the Labeling technique to negotiate negativity

05.

The word "no" is an opportunity to clarify any doubts about negotiation

06.

Use "The Rule of Three" to strengthen the deal

07.

What is the value of "That’s right" in a negotiation?

08.

Turning time into an ally during a negotiation

09.

How to manage the reactions of an interlocutor who says an offer is unfair

10.

Use loss as an opportunity to close the deal

11.

The tricks of the trade: silence, gifts and empathy

12.

Why you should make the interlocutor feel they’re in control and what words to avoid

13.

The use of pronouns in a negotiation

14.

The three types of negotiation styles: the analyst, the easy-going and the assertive

15.

The negotiation technique of Mike Ackerman

16.

Knowing how to deal with the Black Swan to avoid interrupting the plan

17.

Quotes

18.

Take-home message

01. Really listen in order to identify the true needs of the interlocutor

In a good negotiation, we start with every possible scenario in mind and we proceed by discarding each hypothesis thanks to every single piece of information we receive. It is a process of knowledge and attention. This is why many intelligent people aren’t good negotiators, they believe they don’t have anything to discover and that they can move forward while remaining consistent with their initial opinions, which often leads to mistakes. Great negotiators, however, are open to any possibility. They remain intellectually agile and aware of how to operate in a fluid situation. It is essential to know how to listen and fight the cognitive bias that gives weight to every clue we hear in order to seek consistency in what we think, instead of leaving room for the truth. We must also fight the impulse of listening to ourselves. During a verbal confrontation, we often think about what we are about to say instead of listening to the other person. In reality, we should only be focused on what our interlocutor is saying. This is called active listening and it is a fundamental tactic. The goal is to identify what your counterpart really needs (economically, but also emotionally) and make them feel safe. As a result, validating their emotions and creating an atmosphere of trust.

02. The three voice tones you can use to make our interlocutor feel at ease

03. Use empathy to welcome emotions and successfully negotiate

04. Using the Labeling technique to negotiate negativity

05. The word "no" is an opportunity to clarify any doubts about negotiation

06. Use "The Rule of Three" to strengthen the deal

07. What is the value of "That’s right" in a negotiation?

08. Turning time into an ally during a negotiation

09. How to manage the reactions of an interlocutor who says an offer is unfair

10. Use loss as an opportunity to close the deal

11. The tricks of the trade: silence, gifts and empathy

12. Why you should make the interlocutor feel they’re in control and what words to avoid

13. The use of pronouns in a negotiation

14. The three types of negotiation styles: the analyst, the easy-going and the assertive

15. The negotiation technique of Mike Ackerman

16. Knowing how to deal with the Black Swan to avoid interrupting the plan

17. Quotes

18. Take-home message

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Many useful tips to:

  • Learn how to negotiate in every context of your personal and professional life, using techniques developed in the field by an FBI agent specialized in hostage negotiations.
  • Learn how to practice active listening in order to prevent and resolve conflicts in any interaction and relationship.
  • Learn how to distinguish the different types of "yes" and understand when someone is lying.

Christopher Voss is a former FBI agent specialized in hostage negotiation. In 2007, Voss left the FBI after having managed over 150 negotiations in international contexts. He then founded The Black Swan Group Ltd to share his skills and expertise. Today, he teaches his negotiation techniques in various universities, techniques that he has developed through field experience and that are applicable to private and professional life.

Tahl Raz is a journalist and writer. He defines himself as a business storyteller. Raz is the editor of "Fortune Small Business" and former writer for Inc. magazine, the Jerusalem Post, the San Francisco Chronicle, and GQ. He lives in New York and also works as a consultant for large companies.

Publishing house:

Harper Business

Year:

2017

Pages:

288

ISBN:

978-1847941497